Warden Toomey and the Poachers

Warden Toomey and the Poachers
by Bucky Lewis

Warden Wilbrod Toomey had been on the job for a little over 29 years and was getting set to retire on the other side of the upcoming spring. As any man who had a long and secure professional life as well as being married even that much longer to a woman who's favorite room in the house was the kitchen, he had built a considerable shed over his tool. You know, couldn't quite see everything he was washin'? And now in the twilight of his illustrious career, his favorite sport was playing finger hockey with the remote while passing time and gas on the sofa.

Well. Old Willie had seen it all. Each and every way to spell 'illegal' in the world of hunting and fishing people tried it, only to be met by Willie either in the middle of the lake with an illegal limit of fish, in the middle of a swamp with the wrong kinds of ducks, in the middle of a trap line in a prohibited area, or even catching loggers illegally strip cutting a stand of trees. He had been there, done that. Plus, he had been on the job long enough that he had his own way of dispensing justice without over-burdening the court systems. Many a Dept. of Wildlife & Fisheries fine was paid "on behalf of the State of New Hampshire" in the simple confines of Willie's kitchen. Of course it always had to be cash. And you never did seem to receive anything official about your donation afterward in the mail.

Warden Willie had been around so long and was the 'keeper of the castle' when it came to the governing of this area's chief export-outdoor recreation- that each story involving him grew in magnificence more so than one's own particular experience in the wild. In other words, stories that surrounded him were larger than life.

Heck, folks here still talk about the time he delivered Mrs. Madison's triplets in the dark without electricity. That was considered a triumphant achievement even tho' Mr. Madison hasn't been seen since. Mrs. Madison thinks he went out searching for the other two guys and wasn't going to come back until he found em'! Byjeezuss.

Looking back on all this, Warden Willie's biggest achievement professionally was finally being able to catch the most famous poachers on this side of the state, the Petitechien Brothers. These two Frenchmen had to the state via Thetford Mines, Quebec, roadkilling through the Connecticut Lakes Region, and ending up in his jurisdiction 20 years earlier as lumberjacks and had been a pain in his butt ever since. Literally, from sitting on all those cold and wet rocks and stumps waiting to catch them in the act, he had developed a certain posterior affliction that now even the salves wouldn't fix. Along with their accents and body odor they brought a bag of tricks that would thwart Willie all through the years in trying to catch them in the act of shooting bear, deer, or moose. Many times he would get there just in time to see the lights from their truck disappear over the next ridge, as he stood by the entrails of a hoofed animal still steaming in the crisp night air. Many times he would confront them and then let them go only to find out later on that they had tricked him into thinking the situation was aboveboard.

Like the time it was bow season and the two had come to the weigh station with a magnificent buck in the back of their pickup. Willie was there to inspect all the game and when he saw them come in, launched into an inspection that would have made the Mexican border patrol proud. Willie never did think these boys were hunters enough to actually kill a deer with a bow and arrow. But, here it was, and a big one too. Willie inspected the carcass ever so carefully, paying close attention to the wound entrance and exit area. He looked for powder burns, he looked for bullet holes, he looked for bruises where the animal could have been hit by a certain truck, but the closer he looked the more it seemed normal. Only later did he find out about the Quebec Arrow.

The Quebec Arrow was a device usually fired from a breech loaded 12-gauge shotgun. The shooter would take a shotgun shell, open up the end taking the BB's out, move the feathers up higher on an arrow-which would be balance adjusted later- and insert that end into the end of the now-with-more-room shell. He then would seal it back up again with wax, insert the arrow/shell through the cracked breech and screw a broadhead on to the protruding shaft at the end of the barrel. With a little practice and fine-tuning it was deadly.

Warden Toomey's break in nabbing the Pettitechien boys came one weekend with the help of the air wing of the NH game warden service. The state had 2 high wing Cessna aircraft that they used to patrol over the wooded areas that were the most problematic when it came to poaching. Complete with sound directional equipment, these planes could pinpoint where a shot was fired from at night and then use their infrared scanners to catch the poachers in the act. With the help of this asset, it was one of these weekends that Willie had found which tote road the boys were 'shinin' on. He had a trick that he was dying to try which had worked for a fellow warden up in Millinocket Maine. He knew that some of the best poaching was on the marginally rideable roads. Roads that vehicles had to virtually stop to assess and then navigate over gullies, brooks, beaver dam flooded areas, and other hazards. It was at one of these known gullies that Willie had waited in the bushes on the side of the road and then hopped silently in the back of their pickup as it slowed down so that, unbeknownst to them, he was part of their poaching crew that night. Lying in the back of their truck, he personally watched as Toopee the driver, while spotting 2 sets of eyes with the million candlepower, stopped the truck while Peetoo the shooter split the cross hairs on the biggest sets of eyes and dropped the animal.

To this day Warden Wilbrod Toomey smiles broadly remembering the look on two poachers' faces as he tapped on the rear window of the cab of their pickup and said "GREAT SHOT!"

The Petitechien brothers are due to be released sometime next fall.

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